Relationships are special, but what makes each one truly unique? The conversations, the laughter, the love, the romance and sometimes even the hard stuff—it’s these ingredients that make your connections so wonderful. Sometimes, though, these very things can seem a little routine, and you ask yourself: what can I add to my love life to really take it to the next level?
With books like Since You’ve Been Gone, by Anouska Knight, we can learn that regardless of your past, the romantic ending only comes after a little bit of good old-fashioned hard work. Add a pinch of smiles, a dab of tenderness and a heaping spoonful of understanding, and you’ll start to understand just how delicious your relationship can be.
This easy five-step recipe can show you how to take your relationship to that next level. It’s easy as baking a cake, even if you don’t know how to work an oven!
One-and-a-half cups of awareness
It’s not a secret that you and your S.O. had lives before you knew each other or even dated. Neither of you should be afraid to admit that events and relationships in the past affect your interactions today. If you both can assess your own actions and where they are coming from, it’ll be easier in the long run to identify why problems are occurring and how you can work better together in the future.
One tablespoon of pattern interruption
No one ever wants to admit they’re in a rut. Unfortunately, that’s how most ruts get started in the first place: denial. If you look up one day and you realize you’ve both spent the past several nights sitting on the couch watching TV together, interrupting that pattern and going out for a fun dinner or trying a new bar together is the perfect way to shake yourself awake. A new atmosphere or a new activity forces you to actually pay attention to the world around you and to each other.
One stick of positive regard, melted
Repeat after us: not every negative thing your partner does is personally meant to annoy you. In fact, according to Psychology Today, people in healthy relationships view negative actions by their partners as honest mistakes. If you’re not automatically assuming the worst of them, you’re more likely to see their positive traits more easily. And their positive traits are the reason you probably started dating them in the first place!
Two teaspoons of self-worth
In the words of RuPaul, if you can’t love yourself how are you going to love somebody else? If you have a greater sense of self-worth, you’ll stop projecting your own personal insecurities onto your partner and your relationship. Being comfortable in your own skin and your own mind goes hand in hand with feeling more at ease with being open with your partner. If you’re harboring self-doubt, you’re probably struggling to accept their love in the first place.
A pinch of reciprocity
This recipe means nothing if you and your partner aren’t making it together! If you want to have a better relationship, make sure you’re both working toward it and acknowledging that things are getting better because of the effort you’ve made.
The perfect recipe for romance is heating up in SINCE YOU’VE BEEN GONE, by Anouska Knight. Get your copy today wherever books are sold!