Embrace Her Lady Parts
Several weeks ago, Debby Herbenick, Ph.D.—the Men’s Health Sex Professor and a dear mentor of mine—invited me to check out her latest Kickstarter campaign: What Do You Like About Your Vulva and Vagina?
The main purpose of the campaign? Well, it’s pretty straightforward, fellas: It’s a poster project celebrating the diversity of women’s genitals. (Hooray!)
“We wanted to create something that would counter many of the negative messages that are out there in the world about women’s vulvas and vaginas,” Herbenick explains in her video about the project. So she and her team decided to show the world, through art, how lovely and unique female genitals can be. (Check out the Kickstarter campaign, as well as the poster, here!)
But why is this relevant to you?
I’ll cut to the chase: You could play a major role in helping us feel more beautiful in our own skin.
Just like how you have concerns about your penis—like length, hardness factor, girth, and taste—we also have hang-ups and insecurities when it comes to our vulvas. And the unfortunate thing is: We can’t really escape the “hang-up hype” because we live in a society that constantly reinforces the idea that we should be freaking out about our lady parts.
A solid example (taken from the intro of the Kickstarter campaign):
All too often, society focuses on things that make women feel badly about their bodies. There are products to clean women’s genitals, to get rid of some kind of “not so fresh scent” (what?), and even to change the colors of women’s vulvas. We haven’t even mentioned the political and cultural dramas that often put women’s genitals at center stage!
So how are you supposed to stop this vicious cycle? You can’t. (Well, at least not by yourself.) But you can help create a better vibe for your partner.
How so? Speak up.
Instead of quickly throwing your clothes on after sex, savor the time you have with her while you’re both still vulnerable and in the buff. Linger between her legs longer, and tell her how much you love the way she looks, tastes, smells, and feels.
This positive reinforcement will not only encourage her to view her body in a more positive light, but strengthen your sexual connection, too. (Not kidding: A study in the International Journal of Sexual Health found that women who have negative feelings about their genitalia have a harder time reaching orgasm and are less likely to see their gynecologist on a regular basis.)
So let your guard down and give it a try, will ya? I’m pretty sure both of you will be pleased with the result.
Read more at Men’s Health: http://blogs.menshealth.com/girl-next-door/embrace-her-lady-parts/2013/08/02/#ixzz2cjOMdcgKPin It